


Oh, If You Knew What It Meant To Me

by silverraindrop



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: EvilCharming Brotp, Like really slow, Regina centric, super slow- burn SwanQueen, tw: attempted suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-18
Updated: 2016-04-12
Packaged: 2018-05-21 13:38:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6053572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverraindrop/pseuds/silverraindrop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Daniel comes back, David comes to talk to Regina about what happened at the stables, only to find her in bed covered in blood. He realises that there is more to her story that he knows, and decides to help her get better. He, Henry and Archie begin to rehabilitate the queen while trying to get Emma and Snow home from the Enchanted Forest. <br/>x<br/>This will be the slowest of slowburns for SwanQueen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. She's Running Out

**Author's Note:**

> So... this is my first OUAT fanfic, and the first thing I have written in a long time. I really hope you like it. It kind of came to me when I was rewatching season 2 at three in the morning and I realised that Regina had to essentially kill the love of her life, and no one talks about it after. I have plans in my head for this to last a while, and I hope you guys like it and I manage to keep it going.
> 
> The story title is from the song Daydreaming by Dark, Dark, Dark.

"Regina?" David opened the queen's front door, "Regina, we need to talk." They did. Henry had taken ages to calm down after they left the stables, and he needed to speak with Regina about the fact that she had once again put Henry in harm's way. "Regina? Regina where are you?" No answer.

  
Knowing Regina would kill him if she caught him snooping, David began to search downstairs, to no avail, he knew she spent most of her time in her kitchen, and found it odd that there was no sign of her. So he slowly made his way up the winding staircase. He checked every impeccable, unused guest room, eventually coming across Henry's room, so completely different from the rest of the house, finally, he found what he assumed to be Regina's room, with it being the only room in the large house he hadn't checked, and pushed the door open quietly, not wanting to intrude on Regina's private space.

  
He needn't have worried about Regina admonishing him (or incinerating him) for invading her privacy. When he opened the door fully, he found the queen curled on her bed, her blood staining her crisp with sheets, and the photographs lying on the bed with her. Head and heart pounding, David quickly examined her, finding four deep wounds in her abdomen. With one hand and part of the bedspread putting pressure on Regina's abdomen, he used the other to call for an ambulance.

  
xxxxxxxxx

  
With Whale out of action due to his loss of limb, Regina was handed off onto some rather more forgiving doctors on her arrival to Storybrooke General Hospital. One of the nurses keeping him updated told David that she and her husband ran the apothecary in Regina's village when she was growing up. "She was a sweet girl," she had said, "when her mother let her out."

  
It wasn't until Ruby texted him that she'd given Henry dinner, that he realised he was going to have to tell Regina's son about this, and after the day he already had. He knew that letting this news get out would be a bad idea, so he called the one person he knew wouldn't tell a soul. Archie. On hearing what happened Archie insisted he come to the hospital to she how she was doing. They were still working on her when he arrived.

  
"She tried to kill herself?" he'd asked in disbelief, "she'd been doing so well. She was really opening up." Regina had been seeing Dr Hopper on and off ever since she adopted Henry, and more frequently after the curse broke, trying to give up magic and be a better person for her son.

  
"She's been seeing you?" David asked, shocked. The Evil Queen going to therapy, that just didn't seem right. "Since when?"

  
"I can't disclose much," Archie replied, "but she's really trying, to be better, for Henry. She wants to wean herself off magic, in a way." A few times a week, Regina would come in and tell Dr Hopper why she wanted to use magic, why she did, why she didn't. It had started to go a lot deeper than that, and sometimes, when she really needed a magical outlet, Archie let her show him some of her memories. Awful memories. He wasn't going to tell David any of this, but he certainly wasn't going to let him use this as an excuse to take her son from her. "David, I know...I have seen parts of that woman's life that none of us want you to know about, but I will tell you that this happening isn't as shocking as it seems."

  
The prince nodded, surprised, but understanding doctor-patient confidence. The two men sat together, discussing what to tell Henry, eventually deciding to wait for Regina, while they waited for the doctors to finish with her. It was almost an hour before the doctor emerged, telling them that she was stabilised and sedated an they could go in and sit with her.

  
What they saw when they entered Regina's private room was almost enough to make them ill. Their queen looked..small, smaller than either of them thought she could possibly look. She was pale and fragile, and they both noticed how unusually bony her arms were. "I should have checked up on her earlier." David sighed, settling himself on he edge of her bed, taking one of her cold hands in his.

  
"What exactly happened today David?" Archie asked, "from my experience, it takes a lot to push Regina off the edge."

  
David hesitated, he still wasn't exactly sure what happened today. "Does Regina mention a guy.. Daniel?"

It was Archie's turn to sigh, he knew all about Daniel. "Yeah,her fiancé, she talks about him all the time. What happened, David?"

  
"Whale brought him back, from the dead," David started, "but not.. fully, he was...a monster. He nearly hurt Henry at the stables. She asked me... begged me, to let her talk to him, so I took Henry home, calmed him down, and when I went to talk to her about it... I found her unconscious, covered in blood."

  
Archie nodded slowly, deciding what he could tell David. "Regina isn't one to talk about her feelings, or her experiences, makes for difficult therapy sessions, but we found a way around it, and I can tell you, Regina has been through an awful lot of relly painful stuff, stuff no one should have to go through. I have seen her memories, they sit in my office, actually darkening the place, you can feel them if you stand too close for too long, they are that awful, and you couldn't possibly understand if you haven't lived it. But to help Regina, you have to know her, and you don't. Not even close."

  
"Can you show me? You said you have her memories in you office, can you show me them?" David asked.

  
Archie sighed again, shaking his head. "No, Regina wouldn't like it, and she needs to stop being treated like a trading piece. The best thing that could possibly happen in a day for Regina is someone treating her like a person, and the only people who ever did that were Daniel, her father, and her son, and she's lost all of them. and she sees all of that as her fault. The only thing to save Regina is her son, so you need to think less about saving her, and more about helping her."

  
"Aren't they the same thing?" David asked, confused.

  
"No David, they're not. No one ever saved Regina from her situation. Not the fairies, when she was a child and all she wanted was her mother to stop hurting her with magic, Daniel tried, but her mother had him killed before he got the chance. David, Regina knows that Snow isn't responsible for what happened to her, but it was easier to blame her for a blood relative she had already gotten rid of. Snow was there all the time, she chose Regina, it was her father Regina was forced to marry, and it was Snow White who got the one thing Regina wanted more than anything... her Daniel. Snow White got to marry a shepard, and that killed Regina. I've said too much, I should go. But you should be here when she wakes up." Archie stood from the room's only armchair, and after squeezing Regina's hand and throwing David a nod, he left the room. Leaving David alone with the beeping of her heart monitor and the too quiet queen.


	2. Come Around To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since the last chapter because schools been really busy. I hope you like it though. I gets kinda deep towards the end.

The first thing Regina did when she woke from her drug-induced slumber was look around the private hospital room with a hand resting on her bandaged stomach, the second was ask David what the hell he was doing in her room.  
“Just wanted to make sure you were okay, you’ve been through a lot today.” Regina scoffed quietly, reminding David that he really didn’t know the half of it. “I’m sorry about what happened Regina, truly.” He wanted to touch her hand, give her some form of comfort that might not offend her but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Regina sat up abruptly, only to hiss in pain and lie back down again, her face paler than before.   
“Is Henry okay?” she asked; hand still on her stomach and head turned to actually look at David.  
“He was pretty shaken, but he calmed down quick enough. I left him with Ruby when I came to talk to you. He’s probably asleep by now.” Regina nodded slowly, still looking at the prince questioningly. “Oh, I haven’t told him about this, I wasn’t sure what you would want me to say, it’s a big thing to tell a kid.”  
Regina sighed and nodded. “I’ll think of something, you can tell him where I am if you want to.”  
“I would love to Regina, I would, but he’ll start asking questions and I don’t want to be the one to tell a ten year old that his mother tried to kill herself.” He tried not to sound angry or condescending, but Regina still shrunk away from him slightly, turning her head in the other direction. “If you want I can tell him that Daniel did something-“  
Regina somehow turned paler than she was. “Absolutely not. Daniel would never, ever hurt me. That…thing was not Daniel, and that is not how I want Henry to picture him… and I can’t lie to him again, or I’d never get him back. But you’ll have to tell him… he won’t believe it if it comes from me. He trusts you.” David nodded in reply and sat back in his armchair. They sat in silence for a while before Regina, irritated asked, “what are you still doing here, Charming?”  
David shrugged, “just wanted to make sure you’re okay, you shouldn’t be alone right now.”  
Xxx  
Henry wanted to see his mother the moment he found out what had happened, David had told him the truth the next morning, and the boy was determined to make sure his mother was alright again. David asked him if he was absolutely sure he wanted to see her, to which Henry replied, “of course I do, she’s my mom and she’s sick.” So David let him skip some school to visit his mom.  
When they arrived Regina was with a nurse, who was adjusting her pain medication, and when Henry walked in she sat up a little higher, wincing slightly but she didn’t seem t really care that much about the pain. “Henry…” she breathed out, a smile growing on her face. David, having been in a coma for much of the curse and not having seen Regina and Henry interact much before it broke, had never noticed the difference of Regina with Henry, and Regina without. But he noticed it now. She looked ten times healthier and her unusually thin figure he noticed the day before didn’t seem nearly as prominent.   
Even though David had planned to take Henry into school later in the day, he didn’t have the heart to take him from his mother, so he sat in his chair and watched the pair as they sat on Regina’s bed for hours. Henry told his mother about all the stuff David was teaching him. Sword fighting, horse riding, general princely activities. Seeing Henry so animated was almost enough to cover the slight sting that it was David, and not her, teaching Henry about horses. She had planned to, when Henry reached around twelve, to buy him a horse. But he had one already, he told her he had named him Rodger and she had to laugh a little at that.  
“What’s so funny?” Henry asked. “What was your horse called?”  
“Rocinante,” she replied softly. She missed him, her best childhood friend. “Horses don’t take kindly to silly names like… Honeyspinkles or RainbowSunshine. Rodger is a good name, I’m sure he likes it.” She ruffles Henry’s hair and he smiles back at her. He asked her if she was any good and David had to laugh a little. Both of the bed’s occupants stared at him, telling him to explain himself.  
“She was the best. She taught Snow to ride when she was young.” David explained. Henry looked up at her in surprise, perhaps that she actually did something nice when she as younger. Regina nodded and stroked his hair. “She was a little older that you. She was good, not quite a natural, but very good.”  
Henry went from surprised to beaming. “Do you think you could teach me when you’re better? David’s great and everything, but I haven’t even gotten to ride him yet! Please mom?”  
“Henry is you sure?” Regina asked. “What happened at the stabled yesterday was… a lot to handle, and would understand if you don’t want to go back, but if you do and you’re ready then I would love to teach you.” Regina smiled at her son; she had always wanted to teach her children about horse riding, her one great passion.   
“Thanks Mom.” Henry hugged her gently, trying not to hurt her, and she had to hold back tears as she rested her chin on the top of his head and breathed in his scent. Glancing at the clock on the wall, she patted Henry’s back. “It’s getting late, and you have to eat and rest… and find whatever you missed in school today.” David rose from his armchair and put his hand on Henry’s shoulder.  
“Come on kid, let’s go to Granny’s.” Henry let go of his mother and slumped of the bed.  
“Nobody knows how to cook in this town…” Henry mumbled. David protested that Granny’s was okay, to which Regina rolled her eyes, and Henry replied that her lasagne was nowhere near as good as his mom’s. Regina smiled at that.  
Before leaving Henry pulled his mother into another hug and whispered in her ear, “get better soon Mom.”  
Xxx  
David visited twice a day. In the morning without Henry, and then after he picked him up from school. As much as she grumbled, Regina found herself enjoying the visits. She only got three visitors: Archie, David and Henry. And the latter two weren’t likely to keep asking about her ‘feelings’. Henry talked about school; David talked about Emma and Snow and kept asking for ideas on getting them back. It was actually Regina who brought up ‘the issue’, one morning while Henry was at school.  
“I’m sorry David,” she whispered, interrupting one of David’s many theories on how to get his wife and daughter back. “Emma and Snow… they fell through that portal trying to save my pathetic life… and not two weeks later I decide to end it myself. Not to mention the fact that none of this would have happened if I had just… moved on. And you never got to raise your daughter… But it’s really hard to be sorry about that because I got to raise Henry. And that’s the best thing I have ever done. So I’m sorry, but I can’t take it back… and I’m not sure I would if I could.” Regina stopped speaking and lay back down on the pillows, so David could go back to telling her about his latest theory. But he didn’t. Instead they stayed in a somewhat awkward silence for a few minutes until David interrupted it.  
“I get that… you made choices, I made choices, Snow made choices… now we have to live with them and learn to live with them. I understand now why you did some of what you did; I’ve heard a little more of your story since I got here… and to be honest Storybrooke isn’t that bad. I do wish there was a little less blood on your hands, but while it isn’t excusable, I believe, and Henry believes, that it’s redeemable. So that’s what we’re going to do. We’re family now Regina, whether you like it or not.” He’s sitting on her bed now, his hand lightly resting on hers. “You are going to get yourself better, teach your son all of his princely duties; because you’re probably better at all that than I am. And you’re going to help me get our family back.” With that he got up to leave, and when he got to the door he turned back. “I’m sorry too Regina.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo.... What did you think? I would love to have a beta so if anyone is willing....


End file.
